Be honest now: who hasn’t wondered what alien sex might be like? Or perhaps dreamt of being abducted and given a thoroughly carnal examination by some exotic alien anal probe. I know I have. John Thomas toys are here to help you answer that question, with their Alien Hooligan Platinum Silicone Dildo.

Ahoy me hearties! If you’re buying an insertable toy for pegging, you be wantin’ a curve. It’s that curvature that enables it to get in, and up, and hit the prostate—like a curled-up finger. While other toys might have a little nobbley bit or you’ll need to reposition yourself for the best experience, the Captain’s Hook from Hankey’s Toys is an almost comically curved dildo that’s absolutely perfect for missionary styles of pegging positions. And it’s not just great for the p-spot; if you like big toys for g-spot stimulation then this should work wonders too. But for now, raise your Jolly Roger, shiver yer timbers, and avast ye: the Captain’s Hook!

Short, stubby, and with a massive head, the Plumber dildo from Hankey’s Toys wastes no time in getting right to the business of plugging your leaky pipes. This pleasurable plunger is great for those who either love the feeling of a pronounced head popping in and out, or for couples who love using a strap-on but struggle with longer toys and really want to feel their partner’s body push up against them as they take the full length. Oh—and for people who fantasize about fucking Mario. I guess that’s a thing?

In the past, your choice of fantasy or animal-themed silicone dildos was limited to one or two manufacturers. But lately, we’ve seen the market explode with small, artisanal makers on Etsy (many of which will often do custom orders)—and a new influx of Chinese brands. The same toy that you’re used to paying hundreds of dollars for from BadDragon, can now be had for around $50. As with any mass-produced option, the customization options are non-existent and there are only a few color choices, but personally, I prefer the look and feel of this one. In this review, I’ll be taking a look at one of the most famous of this new generation of extreme dildos from China: FAAK / YOCY.

This squirting fuck stick is vulgar, big, and makes a statement. It's a fun toy that's really great to play with! While it doesn't act like a real dick, it's still a lot of fun. It's great if you like the feeling of being filled up with cum or getting a facial.

Tawney finds the CalXotic rechargeable rumbling and thrusting silicone dildo fun, affordable, and well-suited for those looking to explore thrusting toys. While she appreciates its soft silicone material, realistic design, and waterproof feature, she wishes the vibration and thrusting functions could be controlled separately. Overall, it’s great for hands-free and harness use, making it ideal for vaginal penetration but less powerful for anal use.

The Fun Factory LimbaFlex Small is a versatile, flexible dildo perfect for beginners and those exploring pegging or anal training. Its soft silicone, tapered design, and flexible body allow for precise stimulation, while the flared base makes it harness compatible. Though it has a slight drag, water-based lube enhances its smoothness, making it a great starter toy for various uses.

This is a fun toy with a nice, tapered head. The flared base makes this toy easy to use anally.

The Share Vibe Pro from Fun Factory is a beautifully designed, powerful, and versatile toy that offers strong internal and external stimulation. While the motors operate simultaneously, limiting independent control, the firm, harness-free design and multiple vibration modes make it a great option for couples looking to explore hands-free, shareable play.

This toy is a fun time! It's a huge dildo that's a worthwhile challenge. The vibration, powered by the app, is a great toy for versatile play.